"You're not alone, I hear you call."

"I've been waiting here for you through it all."

Hello, hello. It's been a while. My apologies...

The honest truth of why I haven't posted in a while: I couldn't think of any good opening quotes. No lie. How...pathetic and dorky is that? I'll answer for you. Very. Moving on.

I just got back (just got back = Saturday morning) from a mission trip to Baltimore, Maryland. We did some renovating work on the church and a townhouse that the church owns. Painting inside the church and repairs in the townhouse. The church, Seventh Baptist Church, is absolutely one of the most beautiful churches I have ever stepped inside! It was built in the 1800's, I think, and the architecture was breathtakingly beautiful! The townhouse we worked on was beautiful as well. I have loads of pictures from the trip. I've posted most of them on my facebook, but I'll try to get some of them on here as soon as I can.

I'm in a funk right now. I'm slightly depressed because I have this overwhelming sense of loneliness taking me over. Not just lonely as in I'm single, but in other relationships as well. My eyes were opened earlier today to the reasoning behind this: God's trying to get my attention, again. Somewhere along the road I replaced Him with my relationships with others. I went and screwed things up again and am now being brought to the reality of it.

I don't really know what to do. I keep telling God that too. I mean, the only thing I know to do is talk to Him and read His Word, but it feels like there is something else that I should be doing, and I can't put my finger on it. And that's very frustrating.

I don't like problems. I don't like rifts in relationships. I want things fixed. I want peace and happiness.

That's not happening. At least, not right now.

So, right now I am frustrated. Many tears are being shed. Many conversations that mainly consist of me crying to God telling Him how lost I feel, how sorry I am, etc.. And I really do have this overwhelming sense of being cut off and isolated from others.

Okay, You have my attention. 

When will the emptiness and pain go away? I'm not enjoying the lost child feeling and the cry at the drop of a hat emotions.

The End.